Professor Wu

I really like Asian jokes. I don’t mean jokes about Asians, I mean jokes by Asians—my Finance teacher, to be specific. Please allow me to introduce: Professor Wu.

She’s a lovely gal, and makes sure to tell at least one mid-lecture joke per class. I’m not particularly sure why, as they don’t relate to the topics she discusses at all, but they do make for an excellent source of entertainment. They've also almost all had an underlying violent theme, which seems a little bizarre since she’s such a small and adorable Asian woman. It’s quite the juxtaposition. Anyway, it’s not just the jokes themselves though; it’s the person telling the jokes and the way she tells them that makes them so good. There’s something special about how bad she is at giving punchlines—laughing right before, during, and after them. I wish I could do them justice, but I will do my best via writing.

So yes, I’m considering making this a sort of pseudo sub-blog. I write her jokes down word-for-word as she tells them, so why should I be selfish and keep these little bits of joy all to myself?

Enjoy!

Today’s class lecture topic:

Foreign exchange reserves management in China.

Today’s completely unrelated mid-lecture joke:

One day, a professor gave his class some homework. He asked his class to give him their own opinions about other country’s food shortages.

The American student raised his hand and asked the professor, “What is another country?”

The European student raised his hand and asked the professor, “What is a shortage?”

The African student raised his hand and asked the professor, “What is food?”

The Chinese student raised his hand and asked the professor, “What is my own opinion?”

[Get it?]

I’ll admit today’s joke was a little lame and potentially slightly controversial, but don’t worry. She’s had some real gems in the past. Please enjoy this one from two weeks ago:

Class lecture topic:

RMB exchange rate and exchange rate policies in China

Completely unrelated mid-lecture joke:

A panda walked into a restaurant and ordered a huge meal. He ate lots of food until he was very full. When he was all finished, he pulled out a big gun and started shooting everyone. People outside were very concerned, so they called the police. When the police came to arrest the panda, he said “no, no! It’s fine.” He then pulled out a dictionary and flipped through until he found the definition of panda.

“Panda: eats shoots and leafs.”

I think everyone in the class was a little surprised by the violent mid-joke plot twist. Need I remind you that she’s a very small, adorable Asian woman? Anyway, please don’t think that I’m trying to associate my blog with violent Pandas. Any panda that tries to dine and dash—let alone shoot restaurant patrons—is not a panda I want to play with. But then again, I’m sure not all pandas are like that, and you shouldn't pass judgment on a species just because of a few bad seeds that grew up in a rough neighborhood…

Zai jian,

Jhw